I love to imagine the future, but I’ve yet to come close to accurate in any of those predictions.
Six years ago, it was Oxford and a life of computational neuroscience research! Five years ago, it was off to UPenn and the investment banking world! Then came four years ago and UT Business Honors and then the investment banking world! Three, I’ll marry this girl. Two, I’ll really marry this girl. One, I’m going to change myself. Zero, I’ll never imagine a single future again.
That last one’s partially true; I’ve imagined two.
One of them sets me sail soon. The other brings someone with me.
Given my track record, both of those could dissolve like rust in the way of every future I’ve imagined so far.
The fault in all these dreams I can think of exists in the lie that my future is forged by my own hands and then used to show off who God is, but the truth is that God has ironed out my way and he knows every step I will take and has caused it to be so and he’ll show off who he is and take all the credit for it.
God’s got all of it under control, but I’ve still got to fight across every single pebble along the way. His sovereignty does not diminish my responsibility.
Even so, he’ll give me what I need: shoes to walk on, water to drink, food to give me energy and his promises to remind me where I’m goin’. Maybe he’ll give me what others need: shoes to give away, water to cool, food to share and his promises to show that he is true. Wherever he tells me to go, if I don’t have something it is because it was unnecessary to begin with. To this end, my responsibility does not diminish his sovereignty.
Because this is true, I don’t need my future. I want this one, and I want that one, but for these prayers that I don’t know how to pray, I know the Spirit is praying for me according to the will of God and God always answers yes to those prayers lifted by the Spirit.
So, I know that God’s will is going to be done in my life and it will lift his name higher and ever higher.
That’s my future. I need know no more.
